When I woke up of course you feel strange. I looked around and the male nurse taking care of me told me I did great. I had minimal pain which was great and was ready to go home and rest. I knew my husband must have been relieved it was all over, but what he went through while I was in surgery I could only imagine. I am so grateful for Richard my brother in law for being there with him, I even heard my father in law came too. They were all afraid to stay and see me afterwards was not sure how I would feel so they left once I was ready to go home.
While I was laying there well of course I peaked. I had to look at my chest and the bandage. Yes, my breast was gone, but you know what I was not sad. I was okay. I had a drain on my side which needed to stay in for a week before I see the surgeon again. If you must know that hurt more than the surgery. Go figure that.
It is amazing though, because you want to know what went through my mind. How can anyone go through this alone. One week before my surgery I got fitted for these shirts so I can put drains in them and be comfortable. Even went to a drain class...oh come on now lol.....the shirt had an insert for a cotton boob....well lets just say that was fun. I brought them with me but you know what I did not even put it on. I did not care what I looked liked when I left I just know once I was ready I got dressed and was ready to go.
I know my husband while he waited was scared, he was sad and could not understand why I had to go through this. Him being alone in the waiting room was my worst fear actually and so glad he was not.
Well I had to wait one week and then see the surgeon again. They biopsed my lymph nodes to see if the cancer spread so I had to hear the fate of that. If it did spread more surgery. But I put that out of my mind. I just wanted to heal. Had very little pain, but was so tired and sore. I rested a lot.
Taking sponge baths were not fun but I had to as long as I had that drain. I went out with my drain using my tshirt and it worked well. But of course I kept asking if I looked okay. Kind of hard to manage a cotton boob with your real boob. But all you can do is laugh and that is what I did. My husband was surprised of my attitude, he was going to cover the mirrors so I would not have to see my scars, but you know what I wanted to see. I had to. It helped me get over it. My husband helped me bath it was hard for me to move with the drain, and drained my drain every day. It brought him back to his navy days. lol..we just laughed about that. It was hard relying on people that believe it or not was the hardest thing for me. Here my giving and giving to others and now I need people to give to me. But let me tell you the support I received warmed my heart, I even cried because I never knew I was loved so much.
I had help around the house with my mother in law. She was great. Came over and helped me with laundry and stuff since I could not lift. I kept waiting for Wednesday removal of the drain and to find out the results. I mean come on how worse can it be, Stage 0, and just a masecetomy. So, I was pretty positive about a lot. And felt it is over and I can move on.
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